The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

A Higgs Boson walks into a church. The priest says “We don’t allow Higgs Bosons in here.” The Higgs Boson replied, “Well, without me, you can’t have mass.”

what did the boy from a computer recycling unit in china get on his birthday? Pancreatic cancer.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey pal, why the long face?" The horse neighed.

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I eat you and die of obesity due to high blood pressure and bad heart disease!!!

Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

Pickles

A Jew, a Mexican, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Bartender says: "Get the f*ck out."

a blonde and a brunette sit down to take an IQ test. They both scored above average and were very proud.

A jewish man walks into a bar because he was thirsty.

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

A: Knock Knock! B: No ones home.

How did the guy in a wheelchair get up 7 flights of stairs? He didn't.

There are two fish in a bathtub. One turns to the other and says "Could you please pass the soap?" The other one says "What do I look like to you, a typewriter?"

An Irish man willingly walks out of a bar

I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

h

A man is eating a sandwich. He is promptly shot in the face.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing...he found it.

How did the bald lady die? Of cancer

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no legs. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because its not suppost to be in the tree. Why did susy fall off her bike? Because she was hit by 2 monkeys and a refrigerator!

what happend to the ghost? he dissapeared! :)

Hickory Dickory Dock mother is a whore

Why did the chicken cross the road? KFC was closed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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