There once was a man from berlin He knocked on a door to go in He got such a fright When the house did ignite That he never went knocking again

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What did the man say when he was having sex with his wife? Nothing. It turns out it wasn't his wife, he was cheating on her with his mistress, the woman he was having sex with now, thus destroying their marriage.

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Games stop telling me to press any key to continue. That key doesn't exist.

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Why was 1 afraid of 2? Because 234!

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Ask me if I am a potato Are you a potato No.

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I got it Nero, lets just be friends for now and forget about the work I do here and you there.

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Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

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Roses are red,nuts are brown,skirts go up,pants go down,body to body, skin to skin, when its stiff, stick it in,the longer its in, the stronger it gets,it goes in dry, comes out wet, its comes out dripping and starts to sag Its not what you think its a...Teabag

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Whats worse then your penis in your mouth? Your mom in your penis.

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What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly,

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math test 2=2

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a muslim, jew, and catholic went into a bar and sat down and had drinks. The muslim asks the jew "are you macrobiotic". the jew replies "no" and they go about their fun....

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What did the priest say to the rabbi? "Hey Joe, how's the family?"

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What did Grandma give her grandson Billy for Christmas? Scarring memories of sexual abuse.

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Whats worse than a flat tire? penile fracture

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To kill a hooker and get his money back.

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How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

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what did the black guy get for christmas? a car because he really wanted one.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Need homeless tips? Get A Job.

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What did the Ethiopian eat for dinner? Nothing

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What did the black man do with the piece of bacon? He ate it.

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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Your mama so fat, that it's starting to affect her relationship with her husband in a negative or harmful way. (CSC)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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