How did the blond die? Substance abuse

One muffin doesn't say anything to another muffin while baking in an oven because they lack the organs necessary to attain properties of speech and thought

People are like cats, they both die when they're suffocated

I'm so hungry I feel I would be able to ingest large quantities of food.

What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney loves you.

John Hammond from 'Jurassic Park' looks like KFC's Colonel Sanders. Which is ironic, since chickens are descended from dinosaurs...

What is the main contrast about different banks? None, they all take your money!

Chuck Norris will die sometime in the future.

the jokes are repetitive on this site

A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to the gay guys house. Knock Knock! Who's there? The chicken.

How can you upset Helen Keller? In Braille spell out that she can't see or hear the hunger games

What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing...he found it.

Why is Alan in the hospital? Because he got cancer.

Womens Rights.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it lacks the cognitive reasoning ability necessary to determine that walking into oncoming traffic will surely result in death

This is you cat This is just cat This is wasted cat This is your cat This is time cat This is reading cat This is this cat Now read the third word of every sentance

Whats another word for Thesaurus?

im a selling a car

What is the best school in Victoria? Lyndale.

Knock, Knock Knock, Knock Knock, Knock No One's home.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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