Your mother is so fat that she has diabetes

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. knock knock. who's there? the chicken.

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What did the old man say? Nothing he was so old he died.

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What do you call Chuck Norris when there is a bullet inside of him? Dead.

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a seal walks into a bar. replace "bar" with "club". and replace "walks into" with "gets bludgeon by."

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i would like to know if the rumors about the moon being made out of chees is true because nobody told me it was CC

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What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

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Why can't woman be cokcy? Because that don't have one (Sorry for the sexist joke, to who it may concern)

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Do you have a curfew? No its saturday!

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What do JFK and Hitler have in common? They died.

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Q: whats worse than getting aids? A: Giving your mom aids.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, your tits are nice

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a big fat bully!

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch." It was an Iron bar.

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How did the fat man die? Type 2 diabetes

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This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in a village atop a hill. Citizens were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from the age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest. Fear in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He said to himself, there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's Magical Basement. Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonny's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a carton of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took the carton of Ribena, crumpled it up, spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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How do magnets work?

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A man walks into a bar. He hit his head so hard that he went into a coma.

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have you ever noticed that when geese are flying in a V, that one side is longer? Do you know why? no...why? There is more on one side

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Jesse ziggenfat hates his life. He's really obese. Just like his mom...and his sister...and his brother.....and his dad.... And his dog? Bacon?

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whats the differnce between a corvette and a pile of dead babies??? i dont have a corvette in my garage.

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Q: What cracks while having sex? A: The pelvis of a four year old...

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Why did the Jewish boy grab his groin? Because he was just circumcised.

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A Blonde, a Brunette, and a Red head were on a plane. They never met, and went their separate ways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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