A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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I'm going to Re-write History... History

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Roses are red Violets are blue What was I saying? Oh yeah, your adopted.

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A robbery occurred at Temple University, the perpetrator is an African-American male, 5'11", wearing jeans and a black sweatshirt. Be on the look out and notify the police if seen

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why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

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A fish swims up stream for his anual spawning season The fish dies from a heart attack because of the rigorous that took place.

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what do you get if you cross a cat with a cat? kittens.

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Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

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What is black and white and red all over the news paper of someone with tuberculosis

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Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

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What did chuck Norris say to the docter Nothing he never has to go to a hospital

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A seal walks into a club.

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Jake Bowar

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty one year olds? The orgasm.

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no

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What's the difference between a computer and a television?

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Osama Bin Laden and a monk walk into a bar. Mistaken Identity. It was the Dalai Lama, Osama is dead.

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A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

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Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

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Q: What do you call a plane with no wings? A: An unfinished plane.

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What do you call a guy who set's pancakes on fire? Mentally confused, and in need of a psychiatrist.

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A man was walking on the sidewalk until he saw a bird. He said, "Is that a bird?", and it was a bird.

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What do you call a man who has no heart? Dead

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown, how mad would you be if i ate your golfish? Very angry, as my goldfish is not food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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