Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

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why didnt you take a shower? because my house burnt down

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no legs. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because its not suppost to be in the tree. Why did susy fall off her bike? Because she was hit by 2 monkeys and a refrigerator!

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Du bist mein Kampf

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When does a blond laugh and cry? When she's raped by a clown.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Sam, your doorbell isn't working.

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asian drivers.

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Who taught Chuck Norris? -Chuck Norris

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What's green and has wheels? A bus. I lied about the green.

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Why did Mary fail to consume her breakfatst? Because Suzy has a history of bi-polar disorder as well as anorexia.

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What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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What did chuck Norris say to the docter Nothing he never has to go to a hospital

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How do you keep a puppy warm? You throw it in the fire...

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whats wierder than two lesbians kissing two homos kissing

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How do you make a Mexican parade? Contact members of the Latin community and inform them of your wish to organize a parade celebrating their heritage.

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what do you get if you cross a cat with a cat? kittens.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas ? Cancer

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Knock knock Who's there? I don't know go check.

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What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

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Why did the man known to his neighbors as 'Teetotal Al' buy himself a bottle of whisky? Because there was no factual basis to his nickname.

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Knock knock Who's there? No-one who??? *Silence*

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your mama so dumb her iq point is below average

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Where's my tractor?

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Is this a chair?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops