What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

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LOL. It's East vs LA and Durant

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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What can a bench do, that a south African man cant? Support a family. (I HOPE THAT WASN'T RACIST)

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 murdered 4 and 5 then raped 10

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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What do you call a group of black gentle men running down a hill A group of black gentle men running down a hill

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Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

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why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

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There once were two muffins in an oven, and one definitely did not start talking to the other

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What's worse than 9 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 9 trees.

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Peanut butter is a food paste made primarily from dry roasted peanuts, while jam is a product made with whole fruit, that is cut into pieces or crushed.

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Wanna Hear A Joke ? Afgan

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[Enter Funny-Anti Joke Here] [Enter Retarded Answer Here]

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Your mother

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How many wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. They prefer digging burrows for hibernation.

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Why did a guy with schizophrenia does it take to walks into a bar.

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hey.

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Mr. Burns sex scandal.

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Q: What's the point? A: .

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

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what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

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An eggo waffle had three friends that he will be inviting to his Superman birthday party. WHich friend will get the first piece of cake? Nobody the party was canceled.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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