A baby seal walks into a club. And is brutally murdered for a hunting round.

What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

A Mexican, A Jew and a Irishman walk into a grocery store...The Mexican buys some bread, the Jew buys some bread... and the Irishman buys some bread.

Yourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr soo uglyyyyyy

How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

Why did the boy have a tumor? Because he had cancer.

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

a blind guy walks past a fish market and exlaims.. "it smells like a fish market"

Patrick is gay

What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

Roses are gray Violets are gray I am a dog

How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

roses is red violet is blue i will smack you

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas Mittens

Bin Laden comes out of a cave

What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

What is Bigfoots favorite food? Biscuits and Gravy.

josh roberts you speccy cuunt

Chuck Norris can bench 210 pounds.

What do you get when you kill a black man? The death penalty.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

How are eagles and jellyfish the same? They both fly but jellyfish don't.

What did the priest say to the nun? ... I don't know, I wasn't there.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...