What did one wall say to the other? Walls don't talk.

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Why do all black people have nightmares? Beacause we killed the only one with a dream..

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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knock knock, who's there? you goodbye

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What's big, white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

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What did the Ethiopian eat for dinner? Nothing

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman.

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Potato.

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Yo mama so fat,we are all very concerned for her health.

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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A boy watches as a firefighter saves a little girl from a fire and looks at his mom saying "I want to be a firefighter when i grow up mommy" The mom looks down and replies "Silly kid you're not gunna grow up you have leukemia."

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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Hgiugsf s8dyfgc sdyhgd©•øˆ????ª•†®???ßßs cdiug dvyg 34t5 fd87 vrry utgg erug 46 5gtyrue fVTU? Tree.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

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Where was Susie when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

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Why did the chiocken cross the road? There's no such thing as a chiocken.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

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What happened to the alligator who waled into a bar? He was killed and skinned by swamp hunters in Louisiana.

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What did the boy do when he was cold? Got a blanket.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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