A man walks into a bar. He pulls out a knife, shoots the bar tender, and then kills himself.

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Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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hot diggity dog

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Lil' Wayne

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Friend: "yo momma is so fat........ Me: My mom is dead

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There once was a man from berlin He knocked on a door to go in He got such a fright When the house did ignite That he never went knocking again

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Games stop telling me to press any key to continue. That key doesn't exist.

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What did the man say when he was having sex with his wife? Nothing. It turns out it wasn't his wife, he was cheating on her with his mistress, the woman he was having sex with now, thus destroying their marriage.

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Why was 1 afraid of 2? Because 234!

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Ask me if I am a potato Are you a potato No.

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I got it Nero, lets just be friends for now and forget about the work I do here and you there.

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Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

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Roses are red,nuts are brown,skirts go up,pants go down,body to body, skin to skin, when its stiff, stick it in,the longer its in, the stronger it gets,it goes in dry, comes out wet, its comes out dripping and starts to sag Its not what you think its a...Teabag

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Whats worse then your penis in your mouth? Your mom in your penis.

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My butt!!!!

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What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly,

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a muslim, jew, and catholic went into a bar and sat down and had drinks. The muslim asks the jew "are you macrobiotic". the jew replies "no" and they go about their fun....

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Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

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math test 2=2

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What did the priest say to the rabbi? "Hey Joe, how's the family?"

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What did Grandma give her grandson Billy for Christmas? Scarring memories of sexual abuse.

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Whats worse than a flat tire? penile fracture

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what did the black guy get for christmas? a car because he really wanted one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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