A jewish man walks into a bar because he was thirsty.

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theres safety in numbers? tell that to 6 million jews

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Your mom is SO ugly, I entered her in an ugly contest, and she came in fourth place!

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Granny -You don't sound like Granny... -Just let me in little boy. -MOM!!!!!

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What's black and white and red all over? A nun in a blender.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

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Why was Ray Charles always smiling? because he was a happy guy

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this is a joke

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Being a demigod and slaying monsters isn't normal, but on myth it is. MYTH: Not even once.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? All over. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot.

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Why don't I ever lmao? Because my ass got bitten off by a bear.

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There was a man who bought a cat. He fed it well. It got so fat.

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How do you make a chicken fly? Throw it

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What is annoying and orange? An annoying orange.

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What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

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If a plane crashes on the border of America and Canada, where do you bury the survivors? Somewhere discreet where no one will find them

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Women"s Rights

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Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money? He doesn't keep it. His lifespan is too short to make significant compound intrest.

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Why are black people faster than white people? They are descended from a lineage where athleticism was more greatly selected for in the evolutionary process.

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Why was the girl stupid? She didn't pay attention in school because everyone was making fun of her blonde hair.

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What do you get when you cross corn with more corn? A devestating force that will make you live on a rowboat and perform demeaning puppet shows you will not Even enyoy!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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