Your mum so fat, she died of a heart attack

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What is the difference between a black guy and an asian? They are both black, except the asian

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Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

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Hey! do you have any updog? Nothing much! you?

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Q: How many Jew does it take to change a light bulb? Here is the answer: A: A lightbulb cannot be changed, it either is or isn't. Do you mean replace a burned-out bulb with a new one? Here, in this case, with design, logistics, manufacturing, marketing of just that single bulb- there are many people involved. It could be argued that we all play some small part in the process. ------ Nothing to see here, end of the joke. :)

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Whats sad about 3 mexicans getting hit by a train They were remodeling my kitchen

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You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

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What did Grandma give her grandson Billy for Christmas? Scarring memories of sexual abuse.

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A bar walks into a bar, it is then you realize you are in an alternate dimension.

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what is black, white, and red all over? A bloody panda

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Why did the little girl selling lemon aid die? Someone drove by and threw a fridge at her

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What did the burn victim get for Christmas? A book of matches

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Patiant: Doctor Doctor i feel like a pair of curtains Doctor: ok Patiant: what shall i do ? Doctor: Go how and stop wasting my time

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Shortest Joke in the World? Well, just look down.

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A British man walks into a dental office.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are due to transportation issues. (What if there are no replacement light bulbs in the house, and the nearest store was 10 miles away? It would be ridiculous to expect someone to walk twenty miles to replace a light bulb) In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

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Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

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A Mexican, A Jew and a Irishman walk into a grocery store...The Mexican buys some bread, the Jew buys some bread... and the Irishman buys some bread.

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What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

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A baby seal walks into a club. And is brutally murdered for a hunting round.

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Why did the boy have a tumor? Because he had cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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