Where do black jews go? The back of the oven

The only silverware Frank Lampard will be lifting this year is his mums urn.

What do you call someone who is blind and deaf? Dumb.

Whats 9 + 10? 19

GOOD AFTERNOON KIND SIR OR MADAM THIS IS THE KUNDALINI EXPRESS MAY I TAKE YOUR ORDER

What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

And now, A cow pretending to be a man: Jeff: Alan, are you a cow? Alan: What?! No! Cow: Yah me neither you guys want to go skatebords? *Awkward*

Why did the man drink water? Because he was thirsty

Why did the chandelier fall on the little boy? Hell if I know, the only person who saw it got hit by a chandelier and died.

What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree ? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was attached to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a monkey.

Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers have no feelings.

42.

Q; Why was the man loosing his hair? A; Because since he was at an older age, he was going bald.

cut it out ..but i dont have a scissor

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust

why did the 1st koala fall out of the tree ? it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree ? it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree ? it was hit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree ? it was inside the fridge

Q. Why did the rooster switch on the TV? A. Just for some hentertainment!

Stop being racist!Be a panda. They are black white and asian!!!!

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

My Japanese girlfriend left me the other day... I am now depressed and have resorted to comfort eating.

- How do you keep an idiot in suspense? - How? -......

yo mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the size of the door...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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