What's green and if it falls out of a tree it kills you? A pool table.

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What did the black father say to his daughter? you're adopted

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What do you call 10 black people on the moon? A problem What do you call 1000 black people on the moon? A problem What do you call the population of black people on the moon? A huge problem

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what do u call a person who reads anti.jokes a hipster

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

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What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

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What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney loves you.

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Q: Whats more fun that nailing babys to a fence? A: Ripping them off.

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Who broke into the village's homes and smashed all of the vases? Link did.

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What do you get when you divide 60000 by 30? A Number

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AHAHAHAHAHA XD I cant for the life of me imagine Donald Duck accusing anyone of being a seducer XD, my eyes are tearing up XD If I do not type anything more, its because I died of laughter and joy XD But those "cartoons" where made for adults, ever seen steamboat Willie? That is one of my favorites, I always liked Mickey Mouse a bit better, Donald kinda changed a lot.

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So these IRS agents were negotiating a deal.....

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What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

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What do you call a Chinese man in a cage full of Ostridges? A zoo worker.

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Wanna Hear A Joke ? Afgan

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

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John Hammond from 'Jurassic Park' looks like KFC's Colonel Sanders. Which is ironic, since chickens are descended from dinosaurs...

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What did Tarzan say when the monkeys came over the hill? Hey look, the monkeys are coming over the hill.

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A jewish man walks into a bar because he was thirsty.

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Do you know karate, shorty? Or are those bruises from an abusive father?

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OH NO, ZOMBIES!!!!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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