Knock, Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who, Your Doctor, you have 5 months to live

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Where did little Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A man yells at the top of the Grand Canyon, "Heyoooooo" He hears His voice echo multiple times. He yells again, "Heyoooooo" This time he hears his echo and a girl yell "heyo" back to him from within the canyon. He looks down. He falls. A mountain goat breaks his fall. The man is so thankful for the goat. He says, " Thank you goat! You saved my life!" The goat then pulls out a gun, and shoots him thrice. The man dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

ron:jim i cant get the toaster to work jim:dude thats a thats my car!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats worse than jackass 2.5? Jackass 3-D

thumb_up thumb_down +17

IF circles are squares and squares are purple and i dont know what im talking about does that make all potatoes orange?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Potato

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I was once raped by an Asian... it didnt hurt

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, but doesn't look like a duck? A horse named Quackie

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats another word for Thesaurus?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walked into the bar and ordered a drink, drank it then stood up and left remembering that he once had a drinking problem and had overcome it.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I walked into a dark ally at night and ran into 2 black men They severely beat me then while unconscious brutally raped me. I then spent 5 weeks in the hospital in a deep coma.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what did the ugly girl get on valentines? A paper bag

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walked into a bar and said, oppa gangnam style That man is now dead

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than listening to a teacher talk? This joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

knock knock who's there? al-Qaeda

thumb_up thumb_down +13

There was a seal and polar bear on the same iceberg. The polar bear turns to the seal and says "Roar!!" Then the polar bear ate the seal.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the baby die? I killed it.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The penn state football administration

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops