Jack and Jill climbed up the hill .... and fetched a pail of water.

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Your mom is SO ugly, I entered her in an ugly contest, and she came in fourth place!

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He said it was a great place to retire.

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Whats long and hard on a black man..... 2nd grade

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A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Granny -You don't sound like Granny... -Just let me in little boy. -MOM!!!!!

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for his birthday? Broken arms and legs

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

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Why did the cow stop running? - He ran out of breath

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A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

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What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Women"s Rights

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If a plane crashes on the border of America and Canada, where do you bury the survivors? Somewhere discreet where no one will find them

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How do you make a chicken fly? Throw it

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yo mama's so fat, we are all extremely concerned about her health

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??????????????(?)/// ????????(^0^)/

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Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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What do you get when you cross corn with more corn? A devestating force that will make you live on a rowboat and perform demeaning puppet shows you will not Even enyoy!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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