A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

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Why do reindeer pull Santa's Sleigh? Because Santa won't feed them if they don't.

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A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks the clerk how much a television costs. He said that they don't serve blondes. The blonde files a lawsuit and is victorious by ruling of descrimination.

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Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

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Adolf Hitler was a humanitarian.

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Why was the pencil case unzipped? Because it wasn't zipped up.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? To save the endangered child from getting hit by a car across the street.

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What did Hitler say to his men before they got in the tanks? Get in the tanks

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a woman. Why couldn't hellen Keller have fun at the zoo? She was blind and deaf.

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What do you call a bird on the beach? A seagull.

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What does an Irishman order at the bar?? A beer

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus.

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Knock knock *runs away laughing*

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Stevie Wonder has put on a lot of weight since the 70's. I feel really bad for him because he can't watch what he eats.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

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How did the chicken cross the road? By foot.

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How do you get a black man off a swing? ask him.

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my mom raped yerr foot

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Friend: I said pass the juice, not gas the jews! Hitler: Oh.

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2 peanuts were walking down the street, one was a salted .. the other was raped

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a dollhouse in her backyard? Neither did she.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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