Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Uh, if I say that I am that girl, am I going to be safe?

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One jew, three Canadians and a Dutch man walk into the bar. The jew buys a beer for the Dutch guy, then the Dutch guy responds with.. "Thank you."

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What do you say to a man who isnt funny You're not fuuny

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Q. How do Italian girls shave their legs? A. They lie down outside and have someone mow them.

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Why couldn't sally drive her car? Because sally is a girl.

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So a black man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. He payed for the drink and couldn't have been more courteous

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a blond applies to college she gets in because she did well in highschool

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? Google it!

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So a man walks into a bar and says to the bartender I'll have a beer

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knock, knock . whos there? the police. get the hell outside !

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penis

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What is worse

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You know what's sad about the Special Olympics? Even of you win, your still retarded.

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Swiggity Swooty. I'm currently in pursuit for that part of your body people refer to as "booty".

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

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whats young and never moved? still born baby

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A man orders 3,687 bricks. He gets 3,688 bricks delivered to him. He throws the extra brick in the air. Ok, so a man is smoking a cigar by a woman with a small poodle. They are both in a plane. The woman asks the man if he could get rid of the cigar because the smoke is making her dog turn green. The man refuses. In anger, she throws the cigar out of the window. The man gets angry and throws the poodle out the window. What lands in the poodles mouth when it's falling? The brick.

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Lebron Traveled

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Why was the chimp late for his flight? Because chimps arent allowed through airport security.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van

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How do you insult a Canadian? You just swear at them and hope for the best.

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Yo Momma's So Fat... She tried Weight Watchers, and still gained weight... She hung herself last weekend.

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dad; were is ur head son; its on my neck duh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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