What do you call a man with no brain? dead.

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why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

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A black man walks into a bar with a parot on his shoulder. The bartender says "Hey you can't bring that in here!" The Parot replies "Sorry i'll have him wait outside."

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sdrawkcab ekoj siht tleps I whether you like it or not

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What did the squirrel say to the owl? Nothing, because owls and squirrels don't talk, but the owl ate the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Why is Digimon better than Pokemon? It has a better story and character development.

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What does an Irishman order at the bar?? A beer

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3 men walked into a bar... They sat down and had a beer.

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How do you kill a dinosaur? You don't. It's already dead.

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(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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DIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDIEDIEDIEIDEIDIEIDEIIDIE DIE all of you Hahahaha

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Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a Minute passes.

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What did the racist wife give to her black husband on their anniversary? Golf clubs because he liked to golf.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuse 7 was a convicted serial killer. >----->

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Yeah, just went for more ice, its hot as hell here, and yeah its the weather, I dont mind you using valium, is that the same as Xanax? My mum uses it sometimes, she is afraid of heights and well, has to fly a lot so its complicated, if you dont mind, I have always wanted to know more about you so shall we?

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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What do you get when you divide 60000 by 30? A Number

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How are eagles and jellyfish the same? They both fly but jellyfish don't.

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an amosh person used an electrical appliance

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A woman gets in her car to drive.

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What smells like marjuana and is black? A black man smoking weed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops