my mom raped yerr foot

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Friend: I said pass the juice, not gas the jews! Hitler: Oh.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a Minute passes.

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There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

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Yeah, just went for more ice, its hot as hell here, and yeah its the weather, I dont mind you using valium, is that the same as Xanax? My mum uses it sometimes, she is afraid of heights and well, has to fly a lot so its complicated, if you dont mind, I have always wanted to know more about you so shall we?

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Roses are red Violtes are Blue Sugar is Sweet and salt is salty

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing - because she had no arms Knock Knock Who is it Not Susie

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a dollhouse in her backyard? Neither did she.

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The Charlotte bobcats.

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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Q: how do you tame a dingo? A: Feed it babies

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What time is it? Actually, that sentence is grammatically wrong: what is IT?

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A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You have AIDS, I'm very sorry

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what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

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Beauty is only skin deep Well of course it is, muscles, bones and tissues look disgusting.

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Billy isn't a homosexual, he just has sex with men. Billy has sex with men, because Billy's in prison.

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I was purple once. I took a shower later that day.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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How much does a fat penguin weigh? 45 kilograms.

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if two couples walk down the street, when do they die? when a pack of rabid dogs eats them.

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a man walked into a bar, however the bar was in Pakistan so he got shot by terrorists

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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