Did you hear about the elderly bank robber? Me neither.

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What's small, yellow and great with numbers? A yellow calculator

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Since little kids sleep with stuffed bears, do bears sleep with stuffed humans?

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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A guy and a girl look at a dog licking his crotch and the guy utters "damn I wish I could do that" The girl says: I can totally do that! "really? prove it" the guy says. The girl walks towards the dog and says "you just need to pet him so he don't bite you"

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A boy was constantly getting bullyed at school... so he went home

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What do you call a Jewish lawyer, who is happily married to a woman, but goes and sees a man on the side? A gay Jewish lawyer who cheats on his fake wife.

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A Jew, a Mexican, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Bartender says: "Get the f*ck out."

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what do you call a Ukranian woman without a visa? my maid

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Why can't Amy Winehouse drive? She is dead.

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Stevie wonder walks across the road without looking both ways.

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What's 5+7? Piccillo

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Q: What's the point? A: .

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Three black men walk into a store at 2:00 in the morning, what happens next? They buy some snacks and leave.

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A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

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I see says the blind man " no you don't" replied the deaf man... In the other room

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What did the boy with Aids pray for? A gun

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Dislike if you are gay (watch how many dislikes this joke gets :P)

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A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, "I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first?" "Give us the bad news first", the parents reply. "Your baby has red hair", says the doctor. "Well whats the good news", ask the parents. "It’s dead", says the doctor.

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What's worse than finding Michael V. in your class? Finding Curtis W. in there instead\

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How do you make a dog drink? You put the dog in a blender

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what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

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why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

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A man in a bar says "I'm drunk", immediately 10 men take of their clothes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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