Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why couldnt helen keller drive? because shes a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she is a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

- I have cancer. - SUCK IT UP!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Teacher- "Sally Sue, a sentence that starts with I, please."\ Sally Sue- "I is..." Teacher- "no, no, Sally Sue, when you start with I, you must follow it with am." Sally Sue- "I am the 9th letter of the alphebet."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why don't you make like a tree. and get out of here

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

thumb_up thumb_down +17

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

thumb_up thumb_down +17

is mayonnaise an instrument?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

how do you kill an African baby ? put it in the microwave for roughly 45 minutes

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To retrieve his dead relatives in the middle of the street.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a man with short legs? Whatever his name is

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the robot say to the centipede? STOP BEING A CENTIPEDE!!!! It's funny cause the robot ain't got no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than finding Michael V. in your class? Finding Curtis W. in there instead\

thumb_up thumb_down +15

a black guy leaves prison

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a soda. The bartender says, "We don't serve soda." The guy then says, "oh", and walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How is it called a black man piloting a plane? Pilot, you racist!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a Mexican and a Black man on the moon? Astronauts.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops