Q: What's worse than being fat? A: Getting even fatter than u already are. :o

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What does Batman say to scare Robin? Don't make me get the bat!

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How do u know when someone is horny? look at there pants

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There's no way to know. The chicken can't speak any humanly comprehensible languages so any reason we can determine is pure speculation.

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WILSON!!!!!!!!!

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What's retarded and comes from Eygelshoven? Roel van den Elzen

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Why, if you are blending a baby, should you put it in feet first? So you can look in to it's eyes when masturbating.

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A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

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Knock knock Who's there? Forever alone Forever alone who? You.

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What did Batman say to Robin befor they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Q: Why couldn't the hippopotamus get his driver's license? A: He didn't turn 16 yet.

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A black guy, an asian guy, and a white guy jump off a cliff, who lands first? Well, newton's first law states that every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. So it depends on who weighs the most.

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What do you call a pig sizzling in a pan? BACON!

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sticks and stones may break my bones but cataracts will prohibit you from eyesight

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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What's white and very boney? A bone

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How did Little Jimmie leave school? In a body bag.

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What is worse than a paper cut? two paper cuts What is worse than two paper cuts The Holocaust What is worse than The Holocaust Three paper cuts

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A guy walks into a bar with a sad and depressed look on his face. the bartender says why the long face. The depressed guys think "how bad of eye sight he has my face is the average diameter of about 20 cm long"

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What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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A white man and a black woman run for president The Black woman received 65% of all woman votes, 75% of all Hispanics and 99% of all black votes. The White man still won, and was a great president.

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How did Danny break his bike? No one really knows. The best probable guess who be a tree fell on it, because Danny and his bike were found under a fallen tree.

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My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

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What do you call a person with no eyes? Blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops