What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

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Whats worse than scraping your elbow and knee? Beheading and disembowlment.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a mosque.

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How many beans are in a soup? Who cares i'm starving, Lets Eat!!!

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I once ate at a restaurant where the food was so bad that the chef's name was Earl.

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Guy 1: Are you alright? Guy 2: No, i'm half left!

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A Jew and a Muslim are sitting in a bar. The Muslim asks the Jew for some money to buy a drink. The Jew said, "how much?" The Muslim said, "$7.00" The Jew then said, "yes."

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why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

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What do you call a group of black people? You don't You call the cops first.

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Why should you rape a dog instead of a human. Because there esier to catch

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people...

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what did the ugly girl get on valentines? A paper bag

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Q: What do starving children in Africa eat? A: Nothing

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms. They were lost in a tractor accident.

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Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

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What's worse than a good anti-joke? A bad anti-joke.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Will gropes Ebola victims

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knock knock whos there .. derp

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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What's (333x4)-198+(456x100,432)-10+5? Bet ya said i don't know! I don't either.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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