Jonny runs with scissors. He gets hit by a bus.

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Destiny was calling me, so I picked up the phone.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because chickens can move and the road just happened to be in its path.

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I'm gay.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face pa pa poker face!!!

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A man orders 3,687 bricks. He gets 3,688 bricks delivered to him. He throws the extra brick in the air. Ok, so a man is smoking a cigar by a woman with a small poodle. They are both in a plane. The woman asks the man if he could get rid of the cigar because the smoke is making her dog turn green. The man refuses. In anger, she throws the cigar out of the window. The man gets angry and throws the poodle out the window. What lands in the poodles mouth when it's falling? The brick.

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What do you call a teacher that gets wasted? A wasted teacher.

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The WNBA.

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why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the possum it can be done.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Ronald McDonald was chasing him.

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What is the biggest, most elaborate lie? Santa Clause

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

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Q: What's worse than being fat? A: Getting even fatter than u already are. :o

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The club cant even handle me right now Because theyve reached their limit of people allowed in

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What does Batman say to scare Robin? Don't make me get the bat!

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What happened to Liam? He died because of an infected scrotum.

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How do u know when someone is horny? look at there pants

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WILSON!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There's no way to know. The chicken can't speak any humanly comprehensible languages so any reason we can determine is pure speculation.

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What's retarded and comes from Eygelshoven? Roel van den Elzen

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Why, if you are blending a baby, should you put it in feet first? So you can look in to it's eyes when masturbating.

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Knock knock Who's there? Forever alone Forever alone who? You.

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What did Batman say to Robin befor they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Q: Why couldn't the hippopotamus get his driver's license? A: He didn't turn 16 yet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops