Q: What is worse than bitting in to an apple and finding a worm? A: Bitting in to a worm and finding an apple.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did a guy with schizophrenia does it take to walks into a bar.

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What did the the Priest do to the young alter boy? Blessed Him

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Frown is a four letter word.

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What's small, yellow and great with numbers? A yellow calculator

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whats funny? ebola and 911

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Knock Knock No one answers....

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A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

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Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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People with the best sense of humor visit anti-joke.com.

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What do you call bad anti-jokes? Suckish comedy What do you call suckish comedy? Bad anti-jokes

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Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

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Why can't Amy Winehouse drive? She is dead.

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If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

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A Jew walks into a bar. He sits down for about half an hour, enjoys some drinks and calls a taxi to take him home.

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You are the weakest link. Goodbye.

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Knock knock Who's there? No-one who??? *Silence*

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Bert: Hey, what you got there? Sal: Nothing.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a whale sit down at a bar. The priest says to the bartender, "Jesus Christ is our savior." The rabbi responds, "No. Our savior has not yet been born." To which the whale adds, "MMMUUURRRAAAAAAOOOUUU!!!"

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and put it in. How to you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door, take out the elephant and put in the giraffe. Simba hosts an animal convention and all the animals attend except which? The giraffe. There is an alligator infested lake. How do you cross? Swim across. All the alligator are at the convention.

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In the beginning God created the heavens and the Earth. He then created the water, the sky, land, sea creatures, land creatures and humans. He rested.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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