What's better than winning a medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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A guy is in Weekends Millionaire. He says: I could use a lifeline. Quizmaster: Which one would you like? Guy: Anyone, I have AIDS

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Why did John scream when he came in to his bedroom? He stepped on a nail

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Not the World Trade Center.

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A Man walks into a car dealership and asks the salesman "How many of these Blue ones do you have in stock" ? The salesman looks at the Man and begins to cry. "Why are you crying" asks the Man "I had a dog named Blue once" replied the salesman. And then he ate a taco in front of the Man,wiped his hands on his slacks and slowly backed away from him. The Man thought to himself..."Gee I'm hungry" and left the car dealership to go buy a taco instead.

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Canida

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Marijuana

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

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Q) Why did Anti-joke start this webpage? A) Probably to make people laugh. and to show some irony in a few common jokes.

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How did the Jews get out of Germany? They didn't..

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How did the dragon get AIDS? He had sex with an HIV positive dragon months prior.

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- Mother, where's my bread? - It's in the living room.

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well the duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man, running the stand "quack" then went on its way

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Q: What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? A: "E"

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why did the small child drop his icecream? he was hit by a bus

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a big dick, Lets have sex.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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What did the man say to the homeless child. Where's you parents?

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Friends and Potatoes are similar...if u eat them try die.

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Women Voting

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Religion

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A man went into a bakers to buy a loaf of bread. The baker said 'What can i do for you sir?' The man said 'Id like a loaf of blue bread please.' Baker replied 'Sorry sir we only sell brown or white here.' 'Thats ok.' said the man, 'I have my bike outside.' [This joke was made up by myself and my school friends in 1975 age 15. We all told it for years - i still do - and cried with laughter whenever we heard it. We called them non jokes :-) ]

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Q: How many Jews can fit in a four door Sudan? A: Two in the front, three in the back, six million in the ash trey.

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Why did Sally not get her permission slip signed? Because her parents where murdered. Why did Sally not think to ask her grandparents? Because there in jail for killing her parents.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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