How do you torture Helen Keller? Leave the plunger in her toilet with the handle greased.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting on your couch? My brother.

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so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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h

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What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

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What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Cadaliac? That was my Cadaliac

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There once was a rose that was red Violets are blue Knock Know who's there? Man I gotta quit huffing glue

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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Microsoft Windows

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

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Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

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What do you call a man with three arms and three legs and no nose. A highly unlikely instance that no one would believe is real.

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Have you heard the story of the empty room? Theres nothing in it.

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What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

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What did the racist wife give to her black husband on their anniversary? Golf clubs because he liked to golf.

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What is brown and sticky?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

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Q:What are black people so good at basketball? A: Because they are black!

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why did the guy drop his umbrella........ because he was getting raped.

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Do you know karate, shorty? Or are those bruises from an abusive father?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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