Du bist mein Kampf

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What did the bus driver say to the black man? I like your shoes.

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whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A game of one-on-one basketball in a common physical education class in present day mexico city.

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Why is Michael J Fox so good at using shake weights? Because he is motivated to stay in good physical shape.

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What is worse than being blind? Having a brain tumour.

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A seal walks into a club.

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Where did Jimmy go after the bombing? Everywhere.

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Sup homie G. Shutup you are not black.

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Steve Jobs.

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A fat boy walked into a party

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Ding dong... Knocking hurts.

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The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

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The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

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I saw a man with a hungry look in his eye, like the kind you get from not eating for a while

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Q:What did the cat say to the dog? A: Meow

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roses are red, violets are blue, hey reed and steven, we should hang out

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How do you stop a skunk from smelling? Block its nose.

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What did the man tell his parents after having sex with another man? A. I am gay.

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Knock, knock. Come in.......

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Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock? Who's there? Orange. Orange WHO? Knock knock? WHO'S THERE?! Orange Williams. Sorry, I suffer from debilitating OCD.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops