Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says: why the long face? Horse: I have cancer

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an apple and slicing your mouth on a razorblade

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A person walked into a bar, he saw it was the wrong bar so he leaves...

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Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

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How do you find a needle in a haystack? You don't, you're too distracted by the pile of adorable kittens next to it

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How many nails does it take to build a house? As many as it takes to get the job done.

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Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

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Why are cemetaries gated? Typically, to prevent vandalism and the emotional trama it inflicts on the deceaseds' families.

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What abou three times

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A man goes to a doctor to check about an itch on his testicles. Turns out it was just a rash and is promptly prescribed medication and it clears up in a week.

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Kid: Hey,can i have all the answers to this test please. Teacher: What the hell kid im the fricken teacher.

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How did Hitler like his steaks? He didn't like steaks, he was a vegetarian.

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How can you tell if a Mexican's gay? Ask politely.

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

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Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

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How many jews can you fit in a car? However many seats there are

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holly, a japanese boy and an american boy walked into a internet cafe. They then began to play runescape so they could train together and trade rare items.

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Jokes are funny.

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Penis.

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What is brown and sticky?

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Roses are red, Violets are pencil, this poem makes no sense, refrigerator

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops