How did the guy in a wheelchair get up 7 flights of stairs? He didn't.

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What do a duck and an elephant have in common? They're both yellow. Except for the elephant.

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Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? He's not doing anything, sir. He's dead.

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Why did the cow stop running? - He ran out of breath

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers have no feelings.

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Google Doodles

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Q; Why was the man loosing his hair? A; Because since he was at an older age, he was going bald.

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Why couldn't little Johnny drive the tractor? Because he had no arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because he was a potato

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why did the boy have no friends ? Because he lived in a small cottage miles away from any civilization with his overly strict parents who would not let him see the daylight and deprived him of any kind of childhood, he has no social skills and does not know how to interact with other human beings at no fault of his own. he is also dead

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Blonds are cute and so are u.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

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Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

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How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? over 100

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what do a midget and a dwarf have in common? they both die by the age of 25 due to genetic failures.

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GIRLS that think they can out-drink MEN.

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Q: Why can't Helen Keller have a baby? A: Because she is dead. ...I IS HORNY!

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What's a golfer's favorite sandwich? Well, it depends on the golfer

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what is a big jar and has a human in it? A human in a jar.

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Why do you always find a dead baby in the last place you look? Because once you've found it, you stop looking.

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if your father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops