a man sees a monkey playing the drums at first he thought it waz the guy in the monkey suit that plays the drums but on closer inspection he sees that it is in fact a real monkey on that note he tries to befriend the monkey but the monkey soon tore the man into pieces

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How do you keep a blonde occupied for hours? Put on an entertaining movie.

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Why did Obama win the president election He had a greater amount of votes that Jonh mccain

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roses are black, violets are black, im sleeping

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OGC - tilt your head

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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OBAMA

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Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours being in a zoo But don't worry I'll be there too Behind the bars, laughing at you

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So a blonde was trying to peel a banana, but she couldn't because she was viciously attacked by chimpanzees and had all her fingers bitten off

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A. I have a really funny knock knock joke to tell you! You start. B. Knock knock A. Who's there? B. ....

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Where did the eight year old go during the Boston bombing? Everywhere.

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What do you call a black man digging a hole in the ground with a body covered in blood, bruises and stab marks next to him? An gardener, he uses a different type of fertiliser.

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Why is my car broken? Because I drove it into a wall.

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What is the difference between Batman and a black man? Their skin color and bank accounts.

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Q: Why did the plain crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. By: LV

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Why can't Billy ride the bicycle? Billy's a fish.

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What starts with P and ends in O-R-N? Popcorn.

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Why didn't Jimmy's mum come to the school play? She had a heart attack

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman all walked into a bar. But, the bartender was not happy, as he had noticed that each of them were wearing tops with rude slogans on them. The Bartender said to the Englishman, "you do know that your t-shirt isn't suitable for the children in here, don't you?" "Oh," said the Englishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home to change it at once." Next, came the Irishman, who's top was slightly worse than the Englishman's. The bartender said to the Irishman, "you do know that the joke on your jumper is sexist, don't you?" "Oh," said the Irishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home and change it at once." Last, was the Scotsman. The Scotsman's top was particularly bad, and the bartender especially did not want this top to be seen in his bar. So, the bartender said to the Scotsman, "you do know that the slogan on your cardigan is racist, don't you?" "Oh," said the scotsman, "I'll go home and change it at once."

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? SOL.

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What's retarded and comes from Eygelshoven? Roel van den Elzen

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A duck, a mailman, and a poet were contemplating suicide, then they changed their minds.

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"Billy Mays here!" No he's not. He's dead.

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? One if part of the four main food groups, and one is not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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