why cant sophie lifeguard safely because she cant swim that good

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What's the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have their Bar Mitzvah in Nazi Germany.

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What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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2 black guys and a Mexican are in the backseat of a car. Who's driving. The cops

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What's green and if it falls out of a tree it kills you? A pool table.

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Which way do gay people walk? in One Direction

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How many nails does it take to build a house? As many as it takes to get the job done.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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How do you find Nemo? Watch the movie.

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whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

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Rebbeca black walked into a bar on Saturday

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

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Whatsthe best way to kill a blonde? Tell her theres a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What do you call a bird with wings? Redundant.

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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roses are red violets are blue i dont really care about you

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house red. Babies, especially dead ones cannot paint.

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Miranda Lorenz is a WHORE!!! She has slept with three guys while in a relationship!! then when he broke up with her for cheating on him, she keyed his car!! Psycho Bitch!!!

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why did the guy drop his umbrella........ because he was getting raped.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

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There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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