A man walks into a bar. Jeremy Lin congratulates him for being a person.

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roses are red, violets are purple, sugar is sweet, and so are... hmmm...

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Knock knock? Who's there? Madeline i am back!! :D

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What's white and very boney? A bone

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1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

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what's the funniest anti joke? not this one

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Life is like a box of chocolates. You eat them. get fat. Die.

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. Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

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How does a blind bit of difference differ from one that can see?

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I used to walk in front of archers, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

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Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

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Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

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How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

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roses are flowers violets are too violets are purple not fuing blue

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What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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Why does Kony kidnap infants? To create an Infantry

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Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

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What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

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Timmy stop making noises while mommy is working. I have to finish these TPS reports or else my boss will be very mad at me and we won't have Christmas again.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

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Why couldn't Larry walk his dog? Larry doesn't have a dog.

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A black man and an asian woman have a baby. Then a hispanic and a native american have a baby. Their babies have a baby. What is the baby? Society's worst nightmare.

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What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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