How many people with ADD does it take to...Oh look! Shiny!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did little Johnny eat his homework? Because his family is very poor and he rarely eats.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you give a small child when you don't have any candy? Nothing, you just kidnap them.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you cal a black boy with a bike? A thief

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

your face!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Wolf Pussy

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Q: How many Jew does it take to change a light bulb? Here is the answer: A: A lightbulb cannot be changed, it either is or isn't. Do you mean replace a burned-out bulb with a new one? Here, in this case, with design, logistics, manufacturing, marketing of just that single bulb- there are many people involved. It could be argued that we all play some small part in the process. ------ Nothing to see here, end of the joke. :)

thumb_up thumb_down +83

What is worse than a paper cut? two paper cuts What is worse than two paper cuts The Holocaust What is worse than The Holocaust Three paper cuts

thumb_up thumb_down +65

how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A person with light, yellowish hair who has a tragic genetic deformity.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What do you call a black man that is working on a farm? A farmer.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

knock knock whos there? how should I know?

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What did mr. Mackey say to his class. It's easy mkay

thumb_up thumb_down +47

How does a blind bit of difference differ from one that can see?

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What's the same between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Q: why did the black man cry when he went to bed? A: he had just had a visit from the police and apparently his family had been tragically killed in a car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He nearly died, and was diagnosed with numerous dietary problems.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the young boy say "Fuck"? He has Tourrete's

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops