Why did the Octopus jump off the bridge? To breathe

How do you get a baby out of a blender? Call the police and have them deal with the tragedy.

Today, we will be identifying power tools. This is not a drill.

Why did the bride get a refrigerator for her wedding? Because it is a very nice present

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a fox stapled to his face.

why do cats hate dogs? because cats were bullied by dogs in highschool.

Happiness is just at the end of the road... Just take a look at how long that road is yeah i wouldnt even try

What's worst then lose 100$ Lose 101$

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

Q: What's the similarity between puzzles and women? A: Prior to the 1920's neither had the right to vote.

Q: What did Hellen Keller say to the pizza delivery man A: Stop raping me.

What's brown and sticky? Poo

Shit I forgot to put the slash. Thang god for google

Why did the tortoise beat the hare. The tortoise had carcinoma thyroid cancer in the renal pelvis uterur.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

A rabbi, a preist, and a homosexual are at a bar... What a fine example of a well cultured community.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who, Your Doctor, you have 5 months to live

Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

What do you call a black guy flying a helicopter? A pilot.

Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To retrieve his dead relatives in the middle of the street.

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

whats worss than getting a papercut gohnnarea

where do the women go? the womanarium

Why couldn't the little boy see anything? It was dark outside.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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