Person 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Person 2: Sure! Person:1: That was the joke... You missed it!!!!!

Guy 1: there is this really funny knock knock joke. Ok you start. Guy 2: knock knock Guy 1: who's there Guy 2: umm what? I don't know

Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

How many perverts does it take to screw a lightbulb?

Why the girl fell from the swing? cause she had no arms

What do you call a Colombian who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

DIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDIEDIEDIEIDEIDIEIDEIIDIE DIE all of you Hahahaha

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

What happened to the latino and asian man in math class when they had a test? They both recieved exceptional scores as they both helped each other study the night before.

What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a cheese grader? How the hell should i know?

Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, the Krusty Krab is a fictional place, and therefore does not exist.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He farted

What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing..

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

Whats funny about ISIS? Nothing, you asshole, its terrifying.

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

flip flop chop, clip clop cow, POW. hahahahahah. :).

What did the lover say to his lover? I love you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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