What happens when you combine a chainsaw and a baby? 30 years to life

Roses are Red Violets are Blue It is Valentines Day So I had to get them for you or we would get into a big fight, which will end up with me on the couch.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled yo his face.

GUYS! I GOT AN A IN MY PIANO EXAM!!!!!

why was the man coughing? because there was a knife in his throat.

What time did the tennis start? Tennish

Boy: Is your body from McDonalds ? Girl: Aww is it because your lovin' it? Boy: No, it's because your greasy and fat!

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas. A pool.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

HARRY EFFING STYLES

Why did Jill fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't Jill get up? She had no legs. Why didn't anyone help Jill up? She had no friends.

What's invisible and smells like carrots? Carrots! ... well if they were invisible..

Why did the chicken cross the road? To kill a hooker and get his money back.

What did the cripple kid get for Christmas? Cancer. You know what he got the next the next Christmas? Nothing he died.

If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

What did mr. Mackey say to his class. It's easy mkay

haha.

why did bully fall of his bike He was eaten by a fridge

Yo mama is so fat that: it is ruining her self esteem and she worries about her health.

How many nails does it take to build a house? As many as it takes to get the job done.

What's samller than a table but can't go under it? A baby with hay fork in his back.

There's no "i" in tim.

what is a vampires favorite dessert? a used tampon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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