Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

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What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

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whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

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What do you call a kid with a peg leg and an eye patch? Names

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What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Dementia Dementia who Knock, Knock

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

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How many rats live in a llamas stomach? the cats pajamas

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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Q: What word contains all the letters in the alphabet? A: A made-up word, probably.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share personal information with a stranger.

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What do you call five dogs with no balls? Five bitches.

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Why is the horse gay. He rapes 3 children

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The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

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Why did Billy fall down? Because his brain was replaced with a piece of toast.

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What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

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A man in a bar says "I'm drunk", immediately 10 men take of their clothes

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Roses Are Blue Violets Are Purple Black is Purple Im colorblind

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a show horse jumps over a bar

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Steve Jobs.

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My mom just died....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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