Why din't the boy get a Christmas present? Because his dad go hit by a bus.

Whats lemon scented and you shouldn't drink? Bleach

What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

Two drunk men were in a bar fight, they smashed beer bottles on each others heads and walked away because it hurt.

What do You call a black porn star from alaska? By their first or full name depending on your relationship with them and the situation.

A boy watches as a firefighter saves a little girl from a fire and looks at his mom saying "I want to be a firefighter when i grow up mommy" The mom looks down and replies "Silly kid you're not gunna grow up you have leukemia."

A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people up*. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

What did the little boy find when he came home from school? His mother hanging from a tree.

What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

Why did the dog run away from home? His house burned down and his owners were killed.

when do you go to heaven? Never, it doesn't exist.

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Why couldn't the women drive? She was dead

What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

Knock knock Whose there? you you who you know who you are

Whats the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a tasty treat you can peal and enjoy and the other is an orange

Wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment

What do you call a blond harvesting penuts a penut farmer.

Yo mama so fat she has an increased risk of blood clots!

Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.

Q: What's black and blue and red all over? A: I'm not sure. If it's red all over, it's not going to be black or blue.

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

a little girl gets raped

Two drums and a cymbal fall down a cliff. Ba-dum pssh.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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