Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To hold their pants up.

Knock Knock Who's There? Orange What? Orange Who the hell are you and what do you want? Orange I am calling the police if you do not get off my doorstep in 5 seconds you a$$hole

Why did the black man swim across the lake? He didnt. He drowned

why was the cow laying down? because little johnny shot him with a 50 calliber

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:Why does everyone want to know it's just a chicken

Why did the plane crash? I don't know. I wasn't on the plane. Its likely, based on the damage, that everyone on board died and therefore couldn't tell you either.

why is 6 afraid of 7?? because 7 8 9

What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIPCREAM!

what did the dead woman say the boy? I am dead.

BUTTERFARTING

Why didn't the boy eat peanut butter? He had Arachibutyrophobia.

Yo mama so fat, she most likely wont live to 40

What happens when you combine a chainsaw and a baby? 30 years to life

What do you call a gay drive by? a fruit rollup

whats red white and blue? i dont know

The same girl who got cancer for christmas had a birthday soon after, as a present She got kimo...but it failed

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause your mom has cancer

Wolf Pussy

I learned a new party trick over the weekend; I swallow a piece of string and it comes out my other end tied! I shit you knot.

Why couldnt Jimmy swing on the swing? because Jimmy's a fish

Jack and Jill climb a tall hill to get some water from the well for there farther who has been working in the fields. Jack trips and hits his hell on a rock and Jill promptly calls 911 and stays with him until help arrives.

Why did the car suddenly stop? It was at a redlight.

What's big and purple? Something that's big and purple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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