Wanna hear a good joke? I don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Whats worse than being gay? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you make a dog drink? You put the dog in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How many no-armed amputees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You have AIDS, I'm very sorry

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

I said I read te terms of service. I didnt

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

There once was a man from Nantucket. He had a huge appendage; his arm has been swollen from birth. What a bummer

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red violets are blue this poem make no sense microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Hey are you from Tennessee, 'cause you have a very nice accent.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call five dogs with no balls? Five bitches.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock, Knock Who's there? Dementia Dementia who Knock, Knock

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the monkey eat his own poop? Because there was minimal resources where he was so he resorted to eat his own fecal matter

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: Ask me if I'm a tree. A: No, I am not a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A chicken met a chicken, And they were chickens two, Two chickens met two chickens, And they were chickens too. Four chickens met a boiling pot And they were chicken stew.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's the difference between a white guy and a black guy? Their skin color.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what does a nazi and the witch from hansel and gretal have in common, they both put people in ovens.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why don't you make like a tree. and get out of here

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops