My mom's dead

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How do you escape a vicious tiger? You cleverly create a distraction so the tiger's focus is not on you. Then, you quickly run away because the tiger doesn't know you are leaving.

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I love my new microwave. It comes with a list that tells just how long to cook things. Now i know how long to cook a baby for

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Whats the difference........ between a duck?

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your moms so fat... she ways like 300 pounds.

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the your face joke

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Sarah Palin is President

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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Your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it says 300 lbs.

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I love Ciara!

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Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? You would too if your name was Hjshdvcyehbretafvvba.

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in the begining... god made some stuff

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Why did Jill fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't Jill get up? She had no legs. Why didn't anyone help Jill up? She had no friends.

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I used to walk in front of archers, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

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why couldnt the gay man marry??? cause he was dead.

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What do airplanes and grapes have in common? They both have wings, except a grape doesn't.

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Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

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What did the one man say to the other? Nothing, they didn't know eachother

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The doctor comes out of the room and tells the new parents that there is good news and bad news. The couple says they want to hear the bad news first. The doctor says "your baby is black." The couple then ask "what is the good news?", the doctor replies "your baby is dead."

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I am a dog

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Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

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Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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