what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

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42.

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ROSS G IS OBESE

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Whats the difference between peanut butter and jam? I can't peanut butter my dick into someones ass

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minced oaths

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Why is there no African food restaurants in America? Because Africa doesnt have food to begin with

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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So two Jews walk into a bar... Its nice that they take missionary work to new heights

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What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

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abcdHIV this disease is killing me

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A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

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Brian Singmaster. Look him up, he's cute.

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2

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Why can't Hank swim? Hank is a rock

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Someone once told me a joke. It was funny.

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What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

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Why didn't the boy run the marathon? He was cripple.

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whats funny? ebola and 911

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penis that is all

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Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

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Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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