Why can't Amy Winehouse drive? She is dead.

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A homeless boy walks up to a woman. "I'm hungry" "Then you should eat something."

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What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

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What did the downs syndrome say when he walked into the bar? 'nbgzsbjndjgtbnsuzhvcghvdhjdtv.' He has downs syndrome

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Q:what has legs but may never walk? A: a table

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb in your apple.

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A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

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Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

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Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

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I once ate at a restaurant where the food was so bad that the chef's name was Earl.

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A scottish and a mexican were walking on the streets when the mexican got hit by a car. The scottish man called the ambulance and walkked away.

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CHIIIICKKIIIIIIIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Do you wanna build a snowman? Person: do you wanna live * or nah

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Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

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Why was the black man excited when he found a $20 bill on the ground? -Anyone would be excited

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Guess what's funny? People voting for their own Anti joke.

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Peas and Corn. Porn., a deer

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You throw nothing like your mother; she is actually really good at throwing.

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Why couldn't the little boy find his friend in hide and go seek He was blind

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your mom is so gay that...wrong, a homosexual women is considered a lesbian.

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What do Laura Bush and 9/11 have in common? George Bush did them.

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Q:how do you brighten up a room? A:you turn on the lamps

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Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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