Will my son live, doctor? No because you don't have a son and I am not a doctor

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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What's white and sticky? Glue

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I scream. You scream. We all scream.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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I'm Jewish

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Women's Rights

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How do you make a clown cry? You kill his family and chop off his legs.

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A man walks into a car dealership. The salesman was nice and he bought a Mercedes.

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Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll probably just land back on earth.

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Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

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There is a black man and a Mexican standing near the edge of a cliff, the black man turns to the Mexican and says, "We probably shouldn't stand this close to the edge of a cliff" The Mexican agrees and they step away from the cliff.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

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If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

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Time flies like a banana.

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Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

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I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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What's has 4 wheels But ain't a blue car A red car

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What did the farmer say when he lost his pig? Wheres my Pig?

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Star Wars

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Ask me if I'm a giraffe Are you a giraffe? Yes

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What'd the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Just Dance 2 the video game

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Your Momma is so ugly, she got plastic surgery.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops