Wy did Bryan eet his Dumbelllle? Anderson fell asleep again

The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

yo mama is so fat she went to the doctor and the doctor told her she had diabetes

What's the difference between a white guy and a black guy? Their skin color.

Why did the woman have sex with the man? Because she is over 18, which is above all of the legal consent ages in the United States.

Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

Q. How did Kit Kat candy bars get their name? A. It was chosen by manufacturer.

WHATS WORSE THAN THE HOLOCAUST A FLAT TIRE

Why is it nice to wear jeans? So people don't see your undies.

A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

Penis in a box.

Obama enters a KKK meeting Obama: Oh sorry I thought this was the Kentucky Fried Chicken... the font was so small so... as he starts backing off scared... KKK: leader, of course Mr.President, feel free to come again anytime! Moral: Kings Knocking Ketchup is actually a nice place if you not unlike me enjoy ketchup...

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

So one day a man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like to drink. He said he would like a glass of water. The bartender said "why come all the way to a bar just to get some water." The man responded "well its a longer walk to the coffee shop."

Why couldn't the boy ride his bike? He had no legs. Why didn't he have any legs? He was hit by a truck.

Three blondes walk into a community college.

A black man, a jew and a racist walk into a bar, The racist proceeds to be a racist

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his head.

ive got 99 problems and my diabetes is one of them

What did Lady Gaga say to Justin Timberlake? "I love the Backstreet Boys!" Justin Timberlake Replied with a Bazooka.

What do you call a bicycle that likes threesomes. A tricycle

what did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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