What do a baker and gynecologist have in common? They can smell it, but they can't eat it.

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What's red and smells like cherries? Cherries

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What happened to the kid who slept on a roof? He died

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what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing? Answer - A gay homosexual

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Whose there? A chicken.

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newt gingrich

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why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

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Teen pregnancy

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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9 little monkeys jumping on the bed... One fell off and died!

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what did the joke say to the anti-joke? do you want to fight

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what do you call a dog? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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whats the best way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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Q: Why do so many of these anti jokes contain refrigerators? A: Seriously I don't know why

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Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead. Why did the second Koala fall off the tree? Cause it was also dead. Why did the third Koala fall off the tree? It thought the other two were playing a game. Why did the motorcyclist end up in the hospital? He was attacked by falling Koalas!

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What does an Asian person with 3 eyes have? A birth defect.

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I like my women like I like my coffee... Without a penis.

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What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

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What did the racist wife give to her black husband on their anniversary? Golf clubs because he liked to golf.

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Why did Billy fall down? Because his brain was replaced with a piece of toast.

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? She was hungry

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I can Nazi

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What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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