Dad they tell me I am homosexual at school, what does it mean? Ask your boyfriend.

What did the man get when he found a genie in a lamp? The rest of his life in an asylum for schizophrenia.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To kill a hooker and get his money back.

A Poem that would be from a stocker: Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van and NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was being chased.

Why can't an elephant smoke cigarettes? They do not posses the fine motor skills.

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper with some red stuff on it.

Why din't the boy get a Christmas present? Because his dad go hit by a bus.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an apple and slicing your mouth on a razorblade

You're momma's so fat, that I just wanna go over there and make hot passionate love to her. What? I'm a chubby chaser.

- Knock Knock. - Who's there? - You're coming with me.

How do you fit 100 babies into a bowl? You use a blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos scoops.

Why did the unicorn cross the road? i dont know. unicorns arent real

Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

WNBA

Why did the man loose his balls? he had testicular cancer and had to get them removed.

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

Hello, ladies, look at your man, now back to me, now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using ladies scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Look again, the tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady. I’m on Sarah Jessica Parker.

Do you know that car over there? No.

What's the difference between a Jew and a black person? Black people are good at running.

An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

It is green and it is attached to a fence? Green paint

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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