roses are blue violets are red I am dyslexic and possibly a Jew EJ

Why can't an elephant smoke cigarettes? They do not posses the fine motor skills.

Yo mama so ugly... She never got married because most men found it hard to marry her because of her looks

What did the priest say to the rabbi? "Hey Joe, how's the family?"

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

What did Sam say when the basketball hit her face? Ouch.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms ... Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie

What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at six o' clock in the morning? He puked a lot, and was diagnosed with a horrible digestive disorder.

What happened to the orphan on Christmas? he got raped

Homosexual babies? It's a choice

hi

What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

here's a great way to ruin someone's 'knock knock' joke: Knock knock Come in!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

your life

Did you know why people actually fear clowns? Because slapstick humor is dead

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

*Knock Knock* Who's there? Nobody. Go make some friends.

What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

I don't often drink beer. But when I do, I recklessly beat my wife and kids.

A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

Your mother is so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and eat foods with nutritional value.

What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...