Why can't Jesus eat M&M's? Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.

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Why couldn't the little boy see anything? It was dark outside.

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Avery has crabs.

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waste down and had no way of feeling

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a wolf that eventually killed and ate it.

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Come over here boy and have a cigar, you're gonna go far. Congratulations on being the first human cannonball, please use the cigar to light the fuse. Happy landings.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, but doesn't look like a duck? A horse named Quackie

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Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people...

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obama is a good president

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what do you do when you see a 40 ft tall gorilla? WHO CARES, RUN!

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, im a dog

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What do you call a female duck? A duck.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven shot up his school and ate nine kids. Also before he was arrested he told six he was going to blow his brains out. Then he murdered the police and has been on the run ever since.

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Why is ya dad ya dad? ........ because of ya cousin

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

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"Roses are Red" "Violets are Blue" That's what they say, But it isn't true. Violets are violet, Now stop sniffing glue!

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Peas and Corn. Porn., a deer

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer .

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Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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what do a snake and a bird have in common? they can both fly! except for the snake.

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Whats white and cant fly an aeroplane? A fridge

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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