Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

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Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

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What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

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What did you say? I don't know.

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Jokes are funny.

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What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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The Holocaust

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Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

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A welsh guy walks into a pub. This something any average guy would do.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms ... Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie

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What did Sam say when the basketball hit her face? Ouch.

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Friends are like trees. They fall down when you hit them with an ax.

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Go figure, you seemed pretty fucking scared of me back then. "autocast" hypnotic priming, anchors, you know what that is right? You for (as an example) clap your hands whenever you succeed at hypnotizing yourself while staying awake in a lucid state, then you repeat it until you one day just clap, your body remembers the whole sequence and boom it works right away. You did not think that PaulMcKenna could just touch people and have them do what he wants without even telling them what to do right? Especially not McKenna, I learned a lot from Richard Bandler, absolutely nothing from Anthony Robbins, everything I could ever want from Igor Ledochowsky, and absolutely nothing from PaulMcKenna, I went to him last, I should have skipped Both Robbins and Kenna, they use NLP and... Basically call it hypnosis.

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Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

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why did bully fall of his bike He was eaten by a fridge

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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What's big, white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks.

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holly, a japanese boy and an american boy walked into a internet cafe. They then began to play runescape so they could train together and trade rare items.

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what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. It's the middle of winter. Flowers look like poop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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